Things I learned @ TS 2014

Timbeaux

Timbeaux

Administrator and Head Thread Derailer
Joined
Apr 3, 2006
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1) Good Chiropractors can be found @ Wah Bah's. They work for beer.

2) Phil and I should have been born as fighting roosters.

3) ThatPreston is a hippie who sledpulls a Kia.

4) I always have fun with folks from Miami.

5) Roy and I probably shouldn't go anywhere together.

6) I met several CompD Family wives that I hadn't met before.... Your husbands proved that we all married up as usual.

7) Bacon Hastags are exactly as you would expect.... awesome.

8) Retrieval Tongs are not as easily found at a racetrack as one would expect.
 
I try to tell people Phil will come at them like a spider monkey... I've seen him do it.
 
I learned that some people need 4 inch ****ter plumbing.

To never tease someone about human sized chairs and than sit in that chair because it will grenade on me.

Travis G looks way hotter with a beard.

Fried bologna is really good.
 
I learned gingers absorb beer just by being around it and mods twist commitments...lmao

Had a blast Tim and Phil!
 
  1. I Drink to much and do stupid stuff.
  2. Hashtags are awesome when used in the correct place.
  3. Some people determine the quality of their day by the Poop they take.
  4. Beech Bend has the best bathrooms at any racetrack.
  5. How to make a Porn Store employes blush.
  6. Don't mess with Banean Woosley, he does not care!
  7. Roberto The waiter is the most awesome Alcohol fetcher on earth.
 
9) Basketball shorts and cowboy boots look as ridiculous together as I never imagined.

10) Jean shorts and cowboy boots are the official outfit for all girls at a diesel event.

11) Not all girls should wear the official outfit for all girls at a diesel event.

12) The size of cutoff sleeves is inversely proportional to the years of school the wearer of said shirt completed.

13) Phil Taylor can drive a truck and tie a knot in HIS and YOUR anus at the same time.

14) Phil has taken Diamond Dave's School of Ninja Teachin' and isn't afraid to use a joo-dee chop to make sure you behave after hours.

15) Wah-Baas meet n' greet is like a Kentucky family reunion without the inbreeding.

16) Gerbil obedience classes and Retrieval Tongs are not commonly held or stocked at most adult stores. :hehe:

17) 5000+ Diesel Horsepower spooled and waiting for a green light is absolutely as orgasmic sounding as one could imagine.

18) When the occupants at an adjacent table leave the restaurant while glaring at you, and the next does so whilst threatening to leave her husband with you for a week, certain he would return with a full beard, you're not sure if you're doing something right or something wrong.

19) Pizza delivery guys will bring you beer with your pizza if you tip them enough.

20) Side boob is not always a good thing, especially if aureola hair is observed at the same time.

21) Mouthy rednecks that act like jackasses unknowingly to the event promoter get VIP ushers to immediately remove them from the event.

22) #saltlife #heeeygirl #13seconddragster #retrievaltongs #johnnypickles
 
23. Paging someone from the tower does not always get them to the staging lanes, especially if they don't show up to the event. Repeated efforts result in hilarity.
 
24) Joefarmer has given up the carefree Mexican Sombrero in favor of a much more sinister looking Vietcong sun hat. Dude means business...
 
So I'm guessing Phil asked the adult store clerk if they had gerbil retrieval tongs and made him/her blush?

Wow.

:hehe:

wideopen said:
Some people determine the quality of their day by the Poop they take.
Click to expand...

And what the hell is wrong with that? LOL
 
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26) A Waffle House full of people yelling "Heeeeey Giirrrrllll" every time a female walks in, is as awesome as anyone could imagine.
 
Not gonna lie. I laughed heartily at this, and am sad i wasn't part of it
 
28) Personal coolers are not allowed inside Bowling Green golf courses, however 40s and plastic handles of cheap trailer park whiskey are perfectly acceptable.
29) Golf balls do indeed always land penis side up.

Sent from my SCH-I545 using Tapatalk
 
30.) #heeeyyyygirrrrrrlllll is a common saying at hibachi restaurants in Bowling Green.

31.) You can learn a Protestant, Catholic and a Jewish prayer at Chuy's Tex-Mex.
 
Oh, and Roberto is definitely the man when it comes to beer fetching.
 
24vriviera said:
Not gonna lie. I laughed heartily at this, and am sad i wasn't part of it
Click to expand...

You and me both! I'm dam near crying from some of the comments! It sucks that the only year I went, it flooded the track and messed up half of the event.
 
I learned my limit of Tequila shots is 11. and they don't let flat beds pull in the PPl.
 
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